Mom's Care Package

She sent me tea...and jesus christ, I need it!

I'm sicker than a dog.

Matt Kearney says that if I get him sick that he's going to "punch me in the neck."

I said I wouldn't blame him.


That's sad...

Never, Forever Myself

I put on a dress meant for just the occasion, not to dressy but certainly feminine and comfortable, meant for someone slightly special.

I asked you to "zip me up," and you left me half way there.



The users attract users, and become ultimately used themselves.

I'm sorry I asked. I'm sorry I got stuck,

but I'm not sorry all at once.

The users attract users, in the end becoming used themselves.

I hope you satisfy one another, and learn to leave it at that.

I forever fashion a fixed stare miles away, and confused.

I wasn't meant to love with the intent of romance and forever, so I'll love for the hope of flexibility, friendship, and for bridging the gap between eyes confused.

I'll wait even longer...apparently I didn't wait long enough. I should have never bothered you. Please pardon!

I whispered into the other night after I knew for certain we'd never have a genuine moment, "I'll forever shed these tears for others, but never for myself."

I live selflessly, only to be treated as dirt...the gravel they all will walk on.

Friends save my life every time.

I hope they don't fail me now.



"I shed my tears only for others, but for never, forever myself.

Camp Timberlane Love Love, I Want Your Love

I love my room mates: Emily Jones, and Megan Hagar.

I love my summer bad romance.

I love the foreign/new/female staff members.

I love the steering committee...and the fact that half of them didn't know who I was with my new haircut. Melrose thinks I was "the sweetest person last summer...despite the semi-permanent 'deer in headlights' look on my face."

I love the new Trampball Rules Signs.

I love Horhay's.

I love Wifi.

I love sunshine...something finally above 50 degrees (30 degrees at night).

Okay, Horhay's is kicking me out...maybe love is too strong of a word.

iNeed

I need this...or something very similar to it as my next tattoo.

Jaheeeebus

Narrowed down the number of art DIY books going in my suitcase down to two, but I'm having a major issue cutting down the number of various paper products I'll do god knows what with...and I haven't even gone through my art supplies. Why is packing so painful?! I feel like all these weird objects are my friends...and I'm basically telling them I don't want them to come with me because they're not cool enough. I'm a horrible person! This is too stressful. I don't put this much thought into what I wear on a daily basis...oh no, what am I going to wear? AHH!

Went to Town Hall Antiques again today to get more antique sheet music, since I'm almost out of the last book I got. Got more vintage stamps as well, AND old BINGO cards for 50 cents each. I'm pretty jazzed about those. This may turn into an addiction though...someone may have to stop me from wasting my whole savings on antiques in Wisconsin.



I'm gonna miss my overly affectionate fat flatulent cat...she can't come with me? Okay.





Revamped the activities/clinics/staff project ideas list for the 3rd or 4th time. That I never get tired of. I still don't feel like I prepped enough for this...as if I should have all these examples done already. Yeah right, Heather, chill! It's a good thing I'm getting there a week earlier though. I have more time to make that space mine now, since I didn't take the time to do it last year. Reorganizing was not enough!

Then thought...oh, what if he takes one look at me and says, "You're not worth it. I remember you differently" ??? It's the low self-esteem coming back in full swing, and I'm fightin' as hard as I can. Dancing helps a great deal...alone in my room, thinking positively. No expectations; that's the only way we'll get through it.

I'm afraid of missing the shuttle to the Wausau transit center too. BEH!

CHILL!!!

It'll be an awesome summer, no matter what happens. 'Cause I'm awesome, and the awesome will beget awesomeness.